Does Temptation TORMENT Your Mind Even When You Succeed At Resisting?
If you’re anything like the majority, putting more effort into resisting temptation does NOT lead to a life in which your are free and thriving. You reach a point where you are merely surviving in the day-to-day, and not flourishing.
For many of us, resisting creates a building tension, which is just as much or more tormenting than the guilt and shame felt from giving in…
As well, by merely resisting over resolving the problem, we can begin to compensate for the resistance by picking up other bad habits along the way.
Over time, tension builds and results in a “binge-purge” cycle, ultimately leaving you feeling hopeless. You feel hopeless because all you see are two options before you:
Option #1) Comply With It
In other words, obey the urge. To do otherwise would be too uncomfortable or draining. This leaves you in the cycle of guilt and you’re probably thinking to yourself…
“I will be tormented with guilt and shame for inevitably giving in.”
Option #2) Resist It
Here you are relying on willpower or distraction to avoid the discomfort of the urge.
Creating obstacles in your path to help you avoid giving in is not a bad thing, and its can actually be helpful in the short-term, but resistance does not address the true underlying issue.
Resisting often feels like “going to battle” with the urge, you might think thoughts like…
“This shouldn’t be happening.”
“If I can just get through this night.”
“I have no willpower.”
“My mind will continue tormenting me with temptation no matter how long I resist.”
Interestingly enough, this actually compounds the discomfort and stress because now you are not only dealing with unanswered desire, but you’ve now layered on a bunch of mental noise and drama on top of it, creating even more desire and attention to it.
Now it feels like the only way to solve the issue and get relief is by Option #1) Comply with it..
In this moment, our action are giving the urge “all the power.”
Resisting temptation feels like failure because you are still NOT FREE, your mind and body are occupied trying to suppress your urges, leaving you feeling exhausted and unaccomplished at the end of the day.
BUT… there’s a third option.
Option #3) Allow It
This is doing exactly as it sounds (and it’s the best way to handle an urge if you want to de-condition the desire in the first place).
Allow the urge to just be there… without answering it.
The difference between allowing and resisting it is that you actually open yourself up to the discomfort you’re feeling, rather than push against it or try to escape from it.
Get curious.
Breathe into it.
Get up close and personal with it.
What is it that you don’t want to feel?
Is feeling it really as bad as you think?
Sometimes we’re trying to avoid uncomfortable feelings like sadness, grief, or anger.
It’s not to say that there have to be any big, ugly emotions that you’re trying to escape from. It may even just be a bit of loneliness, restlessness, or boredom.
Whatever you’re feeling, you must process it before trying to distract yourself with something else.
What if instead of learning surface-level tools and strategies to endure torment for “a little longer” before you fail….
You could actually transform your mind and eliminate the urges that feel like a life and death battle ripping you in two…
Here’s the thing… the addiction isn’t even the problem… Porn and sexual addiction, and all addictions for that matter, are a symptom of something deeper.
The ONLY thing that breaks us free of tormenting temptation is realizing that we have deeper root issues… and that we are using our addiction to medicate and distract ourselves.
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At Unchained Leader, we have helped 2,300+ men and women permanently break free from the chains of pornography and sexual addiction.
They truly believed that they would have been in the resist-fail cycle forever until they started confronting the ROOT problems, facing them with courage and humility, and dealing with them.
Everyone’s journey started by first watching our Mini-Documentary: The Art Of Freedom where we break down exactly why previous attempts at freedom haven’t worked and what you need to do today to start your journey to freedom.
If you’re interested in learning exactly how we’ve been able to help thousands of others step into freedom and purpose, set aside the next 60min. to watch The Art Of Freedom.
After watching the video, you’ll have the opportunity to submit an Application to our program, the 90-Days To Freedom.
